This applies to NO ONE...Just random thoughts....

This is me , Kelly...I bet you just can't imagine what I am thinking. Today had an interesting talk at church and then of course my readings always make me think extra hard...

I have decided that I think alot about others and probably worry too much abou others and not myself...I think that I even leave my immediate family out sometimes of concerns. But I have decided that most people are really self- centered and we don't want to admit that. For me, I feel terrible when I am doing something that someone has asked or that I think would just plain be nice for me to do for someone and then I find I might be grudgingly doing it...or try to put off doing it. I wish that we could all remember our happiest moment and keep our lives to that spot. We live in a world that is changing so fast that there is no way people can be ready for it. I know that I am not. I know that I always wanted to be a " hip mom" and always keep my daughter under thumb and I don't think that will help things the way they are today. Let me share with you some of the things that people have talked to me about in the last two weeks and see what you would be thinking writing on this page. Two of my oldest and dearest clients have had surgery or are facing surgery and want to be kept in prayers but also for me to know that if they don't make it....Tom Leedy will call for me to do their hair for the last time. Then, I had a newer client tell me how beautiful I was and confident and wish that she had some of that because she would never dress like I dress to go to work and she wouldn't tan or wouldn't be selling Mary Kay....because (are you ready for this) I am over weight and she thinks that would be a problem. I guess that at times in my life I can see where it is a problem and that now I shouldn't be thinking I can still make myself thin at anytime because that isn't that easy anymore. I am grateful that God has allowed me to always find good. The problem with that is back to the thinking that I can fix everything...get upset over this wanting to fix things. We all have things that make us.

We all need to really strive to live each day like it was our last. We should not live with regret. I know that in a family we are all entitled to get mad at each other but I would hate for something to happen to my parent or in laws and there be distress. I have silently laugh to myself all week because of things I have thought about my brothers and sister. They all get mad at each other or the spouses' and then spout off and I was wondering what they say is wrong with me. I also wonder what would happen if we were to die today and left things unsaid or unforgiven...if we are unhappy here we are going to be in the next life and only we can make ourselves happy... you know I have learned that not only does marriage take lots of work and that men and women are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO different and that our needs are sOOOOOOOOOOOOOO different but we need to stop and stand back and realize why God has brought all of us together and in the units we are in instead of always looking for something to pick at or something to change about somebody...we are individual with divine personalities. No one is ever going to nake us feel great about ourselves but ourself...life takes a lot of work and the thing is if we can HONESTLY say we don't like or love someone then we better stop and look at ourselves because we have lost ourselves somewhere along the way.